FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Sext me about skeletons
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
