Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
