Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
