Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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