the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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