carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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