: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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