I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize