3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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