I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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