Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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