i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Sorry my hands just texted you
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
