worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
