A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
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