So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
