Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
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