I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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