of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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