But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
