she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
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