i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Michael Bay diarrhea
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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