We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
