You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Randomize
