we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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