Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
