I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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