redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
