Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
