So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I don't want my vagina anymore.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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