normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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