Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
don't judge my taste in strippers
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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