I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize