New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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