ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
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