Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
