i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
