The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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