Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
