Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Randomize
