I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
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I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
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She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
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