with your own penis?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
