So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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