Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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