i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
