Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize