I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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