if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
