The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
How does it feel to date your dad?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
