i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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