Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
